camigirl4k3's Xanga

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Sun, 27 Aug 2006 12:44:21 GMT

Hi!!!

Confusion.

Sun, 30 Jul 2006 01:50:34 GMT

You know...relationships are more stressful than just about anything else, ever, in the history of life. *nods*
Say you have so much trust in someone...for so long...even going through troubles at home because they don't like that person...but you do, and you're ready and willing to fight for what you think might last. You dont think that person would do ANYTHNG to hurt you...you're both just too sprung to let anything come between you...ever. Or so you thought.
Then on one early saturday morning... aroud 1:30-ish to be exact...the world as you know it comes crashing down.
You get online because you have nothing else to do...tv is all on Reruns and if you have to watch that AquaTeenHungerForce one more time you'll scream in tounges. You check xanga...nothing. Msn....plah junk mail. Then a certain someone im's you because you keep forgetting to turn off that auto run check box on your AIM. Not really wanting to talk, but always in the mood to talk to them you start the convo like you usually do. but...something's wrong....just a feeling at the sight of all the un-grammatical "..." between every word they say throws you off. You voice this with a "What's Wrong". And never did I think that these 6 words that used to cause so much joy....would be the beginning of the end. "You know I love you right?"...Oh crap. You finally get out of them that they had been going out with another person while they had been going out with you. Great. But then they say"...but it was only over the internet...the person lives in another state! I didn't really think of it as going out...just someone to talk to. With you it's Different! I love you!"...Well. there are actually two things wrong with this statement.
1 Yeah the person lives in another state...way up north..you'll probably never talk to this person ever again in your life!......But It's still a person. People have feelings. And Tainting those feelings with false promises and sweet nothings that taste bitter....reap consiquences. It won't just..."go away". That person with hate you for the rest of their life. And I don't blame them one bit.
2. If I couldn't trust you in staying faithful. and You toy with someone's feelings from somewhere else....what makes you believe I think you're telling the truth with..."With you it's Different!"...ha. now pull the other leg.
On the other hand...3 million thoughts and memories are going through your head....all that just can't be a lie....it just cant....Maybe they really have learned...
You check your myspace..*well at least I did* partly to see if you got anything (messages, comments, etc.) and somewhat to see if anyone is still on that you could talk to...someone that you trust and that will help you in this situation. You find you have 1 New Message. And it just happens to be from *shock* the other lover.
You check to see what it was and she's talking to you about how...He went out with her and was feeding her lines from the hit singles..."I really love you" and "we're gonna be together forever"..
Funny.....those are the same things he says to you....what a coinsidence! Turns out it's not always Rainbows and Butterflies..like it seems. They then proceed to worn you that...your lover...has another side. One you don't see. Be careful.
As much as you don't want to believe the person...you know...deep down...there's got to be a little truth to what they're saying. I know They aren't making this up for fun.
They even provide a myspace account that illedgedly belongs to him.
Even though you've begged and bribed that person to get a myspace or tell you one that they have...they always say "I don't have one! lol...don't want one...those things are stupid"
Hm. not according to this well furnished morsel.
You look...and she's just alll over it..I mean you could pracitally call it a shrine or a fansite to the one lied to.
This just breaks it for you. You want nothing to do with your soon to be ex...and you want it to all just go away for now. I mean right now it is like..4:30 in the morning...all your brain cells went home...Jimmy's left but he never really does anything right. You're better off sleep. After thinking about it. and their constant pleas not to leave them and that the other person is lying, friends and family telling you to dump their ass, and don't forget that little pang inside nagging you that everything you went through together just couldn't be a lie.
You decide to go on a break.
For an indefinate amount of time.
Because you really and truely don't know what to do...I mean after all...you do have feelings for this person. Deep feelings.....they don't just evaproate like that.
You're trapped in a constant whirl..of Confusion.
(*sigh* thanks, whoever reads this...I just had to let that out.)

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Sat, 22 Jul 2006 13:53:47 GMT

Get your own countdown at BlingyBlob.com

Interesting...

Mon, 10 Jul 2006 19:06:07 GMT

Today i thought about how come birds dont try to fly into outerspace. like is there some genetic coding that makes them not want to do it or do they try sometimes and crash super bad.
---> Pete Wentz (Fall out Boy)

huh.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Fri, 26 May 2006 11:00:44 GMT

Ok guys...sorry for the delay..I got REALLY sick after coming back from the most awesomest trip to little five points with brittany and her mom...that place...is to die for.. lol
If I had a knife that could uproot cities and take them places....that would be my second to move lol. 1st will always be Tokyo ^^. anyway
Amber = I can't go tomorrow...v_v I'm sorry but unless you want me up-chucking all over your house and then giving whatever I had to you...I don't think you want me going either
Sarin= I should be better by tuesday lol since I'm my stomach's not committing suicide anymore...(well not as frequently) and right now I'm just recovering lol. so definitely. (& +, I can't resist karaoke anyway.)
And as for the new background for my site. all thanks goes to Brittany for making it so uber-awesome lol though I still want to fix one thing....I want to add a background for the posts so that people can read the words easier...

Buttered Toast? I think not.

Wed, 17 May 2006 23:10:42 GMT

Hmm...so hey...I've been told I need to update this but lol most of the times I just didn't feel like it...I'm a lazy person and I don't like to post all that much. (That's why I've been using myspace...because myspace is easier lol. Myspace is for lazy peple.)
Anyway...you know...I'm feeling alittle emo right now. So I guess I need to get in touch with my emo side and post some random crap that I just need to let out.
(I guess I might be angry because my whole family got phones...and crystal got the one I wanted and I'm acting my shoe size right now...but hey. my xanga. I can be as brat-ish as I want...and come home tomorrow and read what I wrote and probably delete it because I sound like a 4 year old brat.but I digress)
So how are you?...*waits for answer* oh that's interesting..well me myself?..My life's feeling rather sucky lately actually, and I feel like...my whole life's going on w/o me. My friends are laughing and having a great time...and I'm stuck in the dust not knowing what's going on and I'm desperately trying to pick up the pieces of that happyness trying to grasp ahold of it trying to mask up the pain and abandonment I feel inside...
corny. but true
And that's just one of my problems *this is where all passerby readers leave the page because they're attention span is gone and have labeled me off as one of those people who complain about everything lol how do I know? because I do it myself* but really I don't complain often..Really I laugh it off most of the time...but..over a while that stuff gets to you.
Anyway, another thing is school in general, I don't know. I'm too young to say I'm tired...yet to old and far gone to say I'm a slow learner. Really, I think the reality is that I've just...given up. I really don't care anymore. I just don't. I know i should. and I want to...I desperately want to care because that's the only way you'll get what you want in life and have a successful career and..lol a great living experience. But...I think I'm so far gone in my procrastination...that I just can't do it anymore. Take for example projects.I get them, plan for what I'm gonna do for them, then forget all about it, as in it never will get done at all. I'm not dependable in the least. Or for that matter organized. and, it's an old and elementary saying....but I never do anything right. and everything I do do right is too little too late.
So I'm taking in Murphey's Law as my motto:
Anything that can go wrong...will.
Case and point. lol
On top of that...*just came back from parents yelling at her about having to do dishes* I don't feel like writing anymore lol...I have wet hands and I just want to go to sleep and not wake up....scratch that...*sigh*...I'll go take a nap and get online...I do have some other things to say it's just that....you never know who's reading this.
-g'night.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Thu, 30 Mar 2006 10:42:55 GMT

OMGOMGOMG...I got KH2. yeah. that's about it. but I can't play it.
wanna know why?...my mother said: "you can't play this game...until you find your DS"
so that's why..
I'm offering a reward for my Nintendo DS..
It was Stolen March 24th, and would be VERY much appreciated if it was returned. like...now.
$100 no questions asked for anyone who can put it in my hand...
I really don't care if you stole it or not, I'm not going to anyone with this, I just need it back. and you're getting $100 for nothing. Just go buy yourself another one...Come on now...
It can be identified by A sticker on the top of the outside of the system with a Bunny on it and a purple background. And it has a Warioware Touched Game in the tray
Please could anyone look/ spread this around tomorrow, even if you don't have it, if you find it or steal it back from the person who stole it from me and give it back, you get free money, and a good consience.
Thank you!

Camille

Hmm. I guess I'm in a posting mood.

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 04:02:25 GMT

Hey I think I've all but abandoned this site. I sometimes come to it on a rare occurance or if there's something important but if you want to contact me check out teh myspace.
www.myspace.com/camigirl4k3

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 19:31:30 GMT

Easy Peasy Lemon Squeasy.

So what's up? ...that's cool. Yeah...I finally remembered I had a xanga after these long weeks of stress, and I figured I'd update and change a few things...and what better to suit my mood than The Prince of Darkness, destined to follow the Road of Twilight? (or maybe I just like silver hair...)
Yeah so anyway, It's a new school semester, new friends, new clean slate right? Personally, when I got my schedule. I jumped for joy, I had all the classes with the best people in them and I couldn't ask for more. Except the fact....that I didn't have chorus. And since I've been in chorus since the 2nd grade...I think it'd be kind of messed up to quit now. So I had to get my lovely day changed...and now I have 5th period with a guy that I want to...just.. stuff in a printer cartrige and step on..and....blaaarrrrrgh!.............*hem hem* anyway. aaand I have B lunch, which no one has. and I'm very bored. And sometimes I just want to skip it alltogether and sneak into the kindergarden class...and nap.
After that it's pretty much ok, I have a new math class 6th period with kelly and alex w. and this sophomore named ryan. and it's more or less awesome. And then 7th period gym with uber-awesome people that are fun to hang out with and considering that I like running anyway...for now...it's pretty cool.
In other matters, Waldenbooks in southlake...is....closing...DOWN! AHHH!. it's not fair!..now all I have is Barnes and Noble...which ..on a day to day basis....has NOTHING! lol It's just not right. But I guess as a ying to that yang...KH2 is finally coming out in March. So...that'll keep me VERY occupied for a week. I've even stopped going to google images looking for KH stuff just because I'm scared I'll see something that will give something away....I've already seen Riku. and Sora and Kairi together...which gave away some...but I'm gonna imagine that it was just a dream sora had in the game and nothing more. Thats my plan and i'm sticking with it. On that note I also have the Opening and Ending Videos on my PSP and Myspace (www.myspace.com/camigirl4k3)...or if you just want it and don't feel like going there, aim me, I'll get it to you.
Alright I'm gonna split, Waldenbooks is calling my name and I must answer it's Closeout Sale call. cya

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Sun, 01 Jan 2006 04:29:53 GMT

HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!